So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I need to learn how to not be a fucking liability
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
