Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
if there werent so many compromising pictures of me in the hands of so many liberal friends, id consider going into politics
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
He just stabbed two olives and a pickle with a fork and deep throated it in front of my family
Not even marginally surprised
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize
