i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I think I accidentally agreed to be someone's surrogate
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
