No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
They ran through the sprinklers in front of campus police, shirtless. Singing "love is a battlefield"
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Tried making out with pop rocks in my mouth. That shit is magical.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
Randomize
