Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I'd rather watch my mom take a shit while reading the sunday new york times than watch mama mia .
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
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