If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Someone's playing Limp Bizkit out loud on the train. I think the decade reset it self.
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
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