is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Im going to make a sandwich and see if my books came from amazon. I cant believe two years ago i was dating eight guys and teaching russian exchange students how to do shots.
The best part about this city is obvious. Someone saw me crouching by a bar pissing in my leftover Panera bread bowl and they just winked.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Randomize
