i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
It's horrible of you to say your above all this when the bar uses your drunk picture to scare people.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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