Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
It's that whole "half Japanese, half asshole" thing. My brother and I have found that people really go for that
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
