You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
Randomize
