i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
I just had someone I don't even know on Facebook message me saying it seems like I drink too much and should slow down.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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