So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
there's a girl in the library on mysapce. she must have missed the memo.
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
