apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
