i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
