i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
It's gotten so bad I typed my will out on my phone in case it's over.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
Randomize
