Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
Randomize
