Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
My breasts were aching with rage.
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize