I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I was angry that a college kid had a new Audi
so I peed on it
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Had a rough day but my boyfriend made that all better by going down on me while letting me watch Top Gear... I'm buying the engagement ring tomorrow
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
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