I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
that thing about your dad's boner was meant to be a compliment
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize