wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
Dear future Eric, sorry about the Everclear. Sincerely, Eric +2 shots E.C.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
