u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
i had a dream last night that my liver tore its self out of my body and ran away.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Randomize
