he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just spent the last three days trying to hook up with a dude for his pool privileges
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
