Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Randomize
