Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
She didn't need to know her brother was thrown out of a bar for getting head on the dance floor. You're a shit head.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
