We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
I bet he comes in French.
just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
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