Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
there are chunks of pepperoni under the sheets. can you be here in 10? breakfast in bed?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
He just told me I was beautiful, whilst I peed into a cup. If this isn't love I don't know what is.
if you want the landscaping job, the uniform is a speedo. no exceptions.
Randomize