Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
You should ask if we are margaritasing tomorrow. and yes i did just turn that into a verb
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Normal people find beers in their gym bag, right?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Randomize