I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
i don't like sucking hair
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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