her vagine was all disorganized.
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
I have an explanation for how we got this drunk this fast... but you wont like it. We are officially in complete liver failure.
I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Randomize
