Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I really wanted to pound but her roomate was making mac n cheese n shit so I was trying to time her moans to the drone of the microwave
He called me in the middle of the night to ask my shoe size. Apparently big feet would make me an unsatisfactory third for the threesome.
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
