Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Is there a way to use porn to inspire him to have dirty thoughts? Like the movie Inception except with more lube and orgams?
Randomize
