Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
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