the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
