Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
I just want to make out with him forever
this is the last time i am going to a 7am booty call
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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