I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
he's downstairs watching tv with my family... I called the home line so my mom could bring me my make up bag cause my real face would prob make him delete my number
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
He threw up in the campfire, the alcohol in his puke caught on fire. Im marrying this man
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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