porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
He passed out on the patio with nothing on but his boxers. So we put our beer caps on him. Yeah he woke up with a polka dot sunburn.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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