Her life must suck. All she's got is "Miss Shamrock" WHICH SHE LOST!
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
We FINALLY fucked. I swear that's the longest I've ever held out for
Umm you met him three days ago....
I said what I said
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
still in the ER. she tried to shotgun a bottle of corona
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize