He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
It's titled "A countdown to death. A psychological look at the downward spiral of actress Lindsay Lohan and her inevitable Hollywood demise" This dissertation is genius. Not a single sober moment for either Lindsay or myself. Good stuff!
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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