my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
LOOK AT MY HAIR, DOES THIS LOOK LIKE THE HAIR OF A PERSON WHO HAS HER LIFE TOGETHER?
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
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