guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Yeah he kicked my ass... He probably wouldnt have hit me as hard though if I wasnt lauging and yelling " I fucked your sister I fucked your sister" over and over again.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
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