Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
