Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
I'm sorry, our booty call lines closed at 2 am. If you are receiving this message it is our off hours. Please try again between the hours of 12pm and 2 am to reschedule your booty call. Thank you for your cooperation.
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
No one will ever find true happiness until they have gotten stoned and taken off the bra they've been wearing all day.
You, my dear friend, are a poet of the deep mental longings of women worldwide.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
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