this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I had to try on three different bathing suits to hide my boob hickies
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
