Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
And then he peed in my hair
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