And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
Black magic does not go near my vagina, it's a rule
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED HAM AND WEED
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
Randomize
