Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
i had to wake up at 4 am to do my laundry because I was afraid if I saw people in the laundry room they would judge me by the amount of clothes I had covered in vomit from syllabus week
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
Randomize
