i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I'm making a contract of things you're not allowed to put in my ass
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
You can't just leave with hair like that
When we were done he got down next to the bed and I thought he was Tebowing. He was hitting a bong that he had already loaded and hidden under the bed.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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