Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
we made out on top of his cat.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Randomize
