marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Its not really a relationship, its more of a sex for booze program.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Nuts. Absolutely nuts. she just screamed in my face something about not knowing whats happening and then got tackled by a dude
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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