he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize
