I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
somehow in between the body shots the bong hits and trying to convince the 7-11 lady to let me fill up my vodka bottle with cherry slurpee. i misplaced my car.
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
Found your pants in the mailbox
What were my pants doing in the mailbox?
I don't know but there's postage on them
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
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