Had sex with the ex last night. Regretting to begin in 5, 4, 3, 2, 1... WHYYYYYYYYYY!
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
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