There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
Randomize
