Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
im returning my roomates shirt with a "i got laid in this" thank you note
i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
It must have been good head...he put down the Xbox controller
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
